2021 Thoughts

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 Hi N,

 Its been a while again since i posted something. Lately i've been feeling blue, i wonder how it feels to be love genuinely by someone. Im no broken. I've been single for so long and some of my friends have their own family. I wonder if I can be able to have it as well. They told me 'it will find you eventually', but for soem reason i feel like im running out of time. Actually, I've entertained someone last year but end up not well. He's far from my ideal but i feel like i have no choice. But guess what because of my recklessness and being in the 'thought' of feeling love, i almost break some girls heart cause i didn't dig deeper. Well im just an amature when it comes to love, yes i know some rules in love but it doesn't mean i can apply em all. Im just a little girl who wishes to be love by someone. To be love by a man. I've been single for so long but i never imagine that it would hurt me this way. Some nights i ask myself, what is wrong with me ? Am I not attractive and such thoughts but im no letting it inside me, since i have more problems than that. I just want everything in a heartbeat and i think thats the problem. Im in rush while everythings moving slow. Im to excited for my future that im forgetting to enjoy the present time.  

Comments

  1. AnonymousFebruary 17, 2023 at 7:25 AM

    Hey. I really really need a friend rn. I am so down. The feeling that I don't want to live anymore. I forgot how many times I felt this way. I don't know where else to go. I have no one to talk to. I am tired hurting myself just to ease the pain. I wanted to die so hard that I keep imagining myself hanging on the ceiling, imagine how I will got hit by a truck and never wake up. I don't know If I am a very bad person that I need to feel this way. I always ask myself if I am worthless. I think I just really need a friend right now.

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